2. Token Compromises

The practice of compromise is frequently touted as a successful strategy for maintaining harmony in relationships.  Generally defined as " a settlement of differences by mutual concessions", this practice conversely, by its very nature, compromises personal integrity and free will. In my experience compromise equates with submission. Compomise compromises the compromisers !

Now I firmly believe that as defined, it is a noble endeavour but 'mutual concession' presupposes acceptance of relational equality. Both 'compromisers' need to be happy with the concessions which from my observation is not generally the case. Generally the 'minor' accedes to the 'major' stakeholder.

I quite like the idea of alternate compromises. Both stakeholders take turns in making the choices. Each therefore has a 50% contentment rate. Then again, each person also has a 50% dissatisfaction rate.

How wonderful if it could be :
I value "you" so I don't want' you to have to make compromises on my behalf.  I'd like you to do exactly what makes you happy, and then I'll be happy.

1. Saint Syndrome

I am becoming increasingly disenchanted with people who claim to "live and let live" with respect to relationships with others.  My frustration stems not from the claim but from the fallacy when uttered by the  self professed emotional noblility.    The very people who proclaim this admirable character trait spend their lives in an endeavour to control others.

e.g is it "live and let live" to infer that those who choose to watch reality shows are cognitively challenged ?  Now I wouldn't care if someone sat and watched a dirt spot on the wall for their entire life as long as I was not expected to derive some  euphoric response to that same spot.  Inference is the gentle assassin, particularly if uttered with a condescending smile and a slow shake of the head. Of course there exists a myriad of control strategies, all testimony to an alternate model.................

the "live as I live" lifeplan.  Hmmmmmmppphhhhhh !!!!

'Self professed sainthood' is a personality oxymoron - it is all about control